Patreon's 8%

At some point, I lost track of the slow and steady increases in how much Patreon was taking from it's clients, not realising this had risen to 8%.  A supporter asked me this week how else he might donate, as Patreon takes so much, and I mistakenly answered that it was only 3% ... thinking, I suppose, that I was still living in 2015.

A quick look at Paypal (the yellow "donate" button on my side panel) shows that they still take 2.9% — so if someone wants to edge out Patreon a bit and ensure I receive a little more, that's an option.  There may be reasons not to use Paypal.  I have several friends who hate it like poison, who go on and on about what a bunch of miserable rotten thieves they are over there, how they're out to screw people and fuck them over ... yet in 10 years of using Paypal myself I've never had a single issue with it.  I always store a little money there and buy things on Amazon with it.

On the record, though I've given it some thought, I can't think of a good reason why a patron should give so much to Patreon if wishing to support me.  There are reasons.  Patreon lets me organise people into tiers — you know, like cattle.  Or maybe some would prefer the metaphor, like rice.  It gives me another footprint on the internet at no direct cost to me.  It gives me a shelter for money I earn, because my government has no idea what Patreon is — so that when I declare the money I receive from it every year for taxes, I end up in the same conversation about six weeks after where I explain to some civil servant what Patreon is, what it does, where it exists and why people support me.  None of them have ever heard of Patreon, all listen in stunned shock as I explain it, and so far, every one has decided that it's not "work" income, so I don't have to pay taxes on it.

Paypal, on the other hand, they know.  Oh yes, very well.  But as I usually collect less than $50 a year from that little yellow button, it doesn't raise my taxes.  'Course, I could forego declaring either, but that doesn't feel like "me."

In all honesty, I don't know if I'm worth donating to.  It's been explained to me frankly by others, so they're convinced ... and I'm not stupid.  I am thankful for the income.  But the last thing I want is for anyone to feel strained where it comes to giving me anything.  Honest, if we're worrying about 8 cents on the dollar, I waste more money paying for a $10 item on my debit card.  Most of us do.  I don't carry cash; I haven't had more than $5 in my wallet in three years — and that's because I was working as a cook and tips are paid in cash.  Myself, I wouldn't hesitate to throw out 24 cents to pay for a $3 item ... but I'm a spendthrift that way.

I don't mean to mock.  All in all, Patreon has been good to me.  Last month, I asked some question about formatting on the website and got a boilerplate answer from a liaison who clearly hadn't opened my page before answering the question.  I shrugged, didn't respond, decided it wasn't worth going over it again ... and a week later some other entity asked if I was satisfied with the service.  I wrote that I wasn't, named the liaison by name, said she hadn't been to my page and remarked on some of Patreon's choices and policies.

I'm in the top 10% of all Patreon earners, worldwide, so when the somebody I spoke to looked at my page, things happened.  The liaison appeared very rapidly, bowing and scraping and pressing her forehead to the floor to ingratiate herself ... which was worth 8 cents on the dollar, at least for a month or two.  I'm rarely treated like royalty, anywhere.

Well, okay, there was that 2022 trip I took to Montreal, all expenses paid.  That was nice too.

Most of all, I don't ever want to come off as a money-grubbing hack who gives nothing in return.  Looking around at some of the big earners on youtube, some of whom haven't posted anything for 6  months to a year, it makes my blood boil.  Ian Danskin of Innuendo Studios, who once produced some of the most insightful material on the internet (in my not-so-humble opinion) has produced nothing but 27 minutes of masturbatory drivel in the last 14 months, no doubt upon reflection of the self-immolated whinging he produced during covid.  There's a place for insights like this — a restaurant where steak costs $19.99 (USD) and one's surrounded by friends who are patient and forgiving.

I live in fear that someday I might drift into this kind of behaviour.  That I might not stretch myself to do the research and actually build a proper argument, instead of living high on the hog on my Patreon money.  Others obviously are.  CGP Grey is producing intermittent shit to a degree that makes me shudder, remembering how enjoyable he once was.  But somewhere along the path, creators drift into this horrorshow of a place where they think any content is sufficient, as long as it incorporates moving pictures.  I do not want to be that person.  My gawd, ever.

So the subject of money, and Patreon, is fraught with pitfalls and moments where a creator can easily say the wrong thing and the house falls down.  I don't want supporters to feel beholden to me.  I want you, O Reader, to feel treated like royalty.  I hope that's my approach.  I hope that's the sense I put across.  I have my ticklish habits, my pitbullishness, my incendiary passion about things I believe — but on the whole, I trust that those who support me understand that first and foremost, I'm appreciative and deeply touched by every penny that's come my way.  I'm not concerned that it goes past some agency that takes it's cut.  It's not really the money, after all.  It's the thought.  That you good people take minutes out of your lives to think more of me than opening a page and closing a page.

Thank you.  And please, take my reminders about donating to Patreon with a grain of salt.  I put them out there just for those who haven't yet considered the possibility, who wouldn't know that was an option without my saying so occasionally.  Who might be thinking to themselves that they want to do more for me than open my page and close it.  It's for them.  It's not a reminder for those who already give.

I'm not a streaming company trying to get you to buy something you've already bought.