A First Month Behind Me

As you read this, you have me today weighing 234 lbs.  Just a month ago, I could describe my weight at 262 lbs.  Today, I have enough money to pay my rent and cover my bills, buy enough food for my partner Tamara and I, and live fairly comfortably.  Were I to rely upon the wages earned at my day-to-day job, I could not say this.  It is possible only because of the care and concern of 57 patrons, who consider my writing, my philosophy and my diligence in educating others in role-playing to be a sufficient reason to offer support.

I know most of my supporters personally, through the blog's comments, through the online campaign, through facebook and the like.  When I could, I've tried to be here to answer questions, offer direct advice, even speak face-to-face in some cases.  So when I say, thank you, please believe me when I say, "thank-you," I have your faces, your expressions, your smiles and your approving glances in my mind, as well as your names and your words.

I would also like to thank those who have lent a hand in the past, in other ways.  Who have given me the advice I needed, or said the words I needed to hear in my difficult times.  I do not understand, when I hear some people make a distinction between "online" and "the real world."  This is nonsense, borne of an inability to recognize that we do not need to be physically with people to recognize that all these people we know are alive and struggling with their own problems.  They have come home from their jobs and they have strained their strength to the maximum ~ and yet, whether in person or through a convenient media, they have taken the time to give an empathic moment of support, to give of themselves, to remember that I am here, and to speak kindly and warmly to me when I have strained myself.

This is what Patreon has done for me.  Patreon has made it possible for me to live a life as a small, common artist, to express myself as an artist will, without having to sacrifice myself or my singular pleasures for the sake of a world that would have us all in harness, all the time.  That is why I am saying thanks today.  Thank you.  Your dollars are paying for the roof over my head.  Your dollars are paying for the meat and bread on my dinner plate.  And you, with your comments, with your words of support, make me feel cherished and ~ embarrassing as it may be to admit it ~ even loved.

This is why I keep finding reasons to ask, what else can I do?  What else can I provide?  I had a really wonderful year in 2019.  I was able to write freely for many days at a time, because while managing my affairs and finding support where I was able, my Patreon followers were always there, always by my side ... and always reading me.

I feel confident that if there were something else I could do, you would tell me.  October was a strain.  Getting my body back in shape for kitchen work, I have every one of you to thank for my not having to work 40 hours a week.  I frankly don't think I could have managed it.  But I didn't have to.  Four days, and not five, were enough ~ are enough.  My friends, you are saving my body as well as my mind.  Thank you.

November, I expect, will be better.  Trimming down a lot, it's not so hard to stand on my feet all day.  Every muscle in my body is strengthening, tightening ... and as the end of the day comes, I'm less needful to collapse and nap my evenings away, rather than writing on my blog or actually producing new, interesting game designs.  I expect that as my body continues to tone, I'll find my energy with each week.  And that energy is something I want to put towards all the things my readers are used to seeing from me.

You've gotten me through this rough time.  Now, so long as I don't injure myself [fingers crossed], I should be able to get back on my hobby horse and rock for all I'm worth.

And with a cheerful demeanour, because I feel cherished, I can't resist using a couple pictures to express my day.  These are not from my place of work; I have no intention directly posting anything from behind the curtain of my job.  But yet the message is clear.  Kitchen work is messy, and full of fire and sharp objects.  Food, however, is wonderful ~ and an art all its own.  It is why I've frequently drifted back to that industry when I couldn't find work writing or otherwise using my brain.  At least, it brings pleasure to people.